Facilitating Triage for Emotional Refugees: Re-Parenting and Re-Homing Ourselves

Photo by Zach Lucero on Unsplash

In war-torn regions, shelters emerge as sanctuaries for families whose homes, both literal and emotional, have been obliterated. These shelters attempt to offer a semblance of stability amid chaos, but the most daunting challenge is that these families have no home to look back on and nothing tangible to strive toward. They exist in a state of limbo, caught between a past they cannot return to and a future that remains uncertain.

This metaphor vividly captures my work and the reality of many individuals in our first-world societies who, despite appearing to “live well” by all external measures, are in fact emotional refugees. They may enjoy material affluence and social status, yet internally, they are lost, unable to make sense of the homes they grew up in or the ones they have built. Their emotions, though keenly felt, are often misunderstood, leaving them adrift in a sea of unresolved feelings and unhealed wounds.

The Concept of Emotional Refugees

An emotional refugee is someone who, despite outwardly successful and stable, carries unresolved trauma, unmet emotional needs, and a sense of disconnection from themselves and others. This disconnection can stem from various sources, including childhood experiences, societal pressures, or…