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More Than Words. Why Our Linguistic Style Matters.
Words create worlds. Words dismantle relationships. Words are apocalyptic. Communication in general is not simply talking. It is an art. It is an exchange. It can be the most impactful exchange or it can be the most miserable energy suck.
Have you ever had a team meeting and present is “that guy”. That guy who must keep uttering simply because he wants to hear himself talk or perhaps he just doesn’t know when to stop talking. We have all met or perhaps been the nervous talker. Nervous talkers must continue talking because silence unnerves them, rambling is their ambient noise and they long to share it with the world.
To be fair, communication isn’t as simple as just saying what you mean. Your words, your tone and your delivery are all crucial, and this differs from one person to the next, because using language is actually learned social behavior: How we talk and listen are deeply influenced by cultural experience. Growing up in my very large Hispanic family for example, we do not own the word “interrupting” in our vocabulary. As a result, we may talk over each other, interject and genuinely get very passionate in our discussions.
Although we might think that our own ways of saying what we mean are natural, we can run into trouble when we interpret and evaluate others as if they should feel the same way…